Makeover

Guys, my blog has had a little facelift. Please visit my updated version at: BetheSunshine.org

Dear Journal.

If you have looked back through my blog at all, I've always been kind of stuck. I want to blog more, I want to journal; but I am shy, and very highly critical of myself. I second guess everything I say-- I straight up suck at communicating. It makes perfect sense in my head, but something gets lost in translation to my fingers/mouth!!! #mumbler. It really is plain silly.

Anyway, I've had this Q and A Journal for a long time. [My BABE of a friend Liz Hasler Williams gave it to me for a birthday one year. Thanks Lizzie :-*] I admit first off: I have been SLACKING to say the least; but I decided to commit to filling it out this year. [Rando: It seems like I only tend to write in it on odd years: 2013, 2015, 2017..] Also, Dave and I recieved the couple edition as a wedding gift, and we have LOVED filling it out so far! In fact we loved it so much that we got almost all of our "couple" friends their own book for Christmas! :)

Such a fun gift, and a great way to journal without feeling completely vulnerable. I was reading back today, and I had to stop on this page: 

It just made me smile, and validate all that I believe in. I have always said I am a firm believer in the law of attraction, and I absolutely think that everything happens for a reason. If you want to be happy, BE happy. You can be anything you want to be, and do anything you want to do if you just believe it 100%. I think the same goes the other way as well though. If you want to be jealous or mean, you will always find a reason to be. If you feel like you have bad luck, you will attract more of it. Think positive! Thoughts have mass, and mass attracts things.. Make sure you're adding good to this world and you will get nothing but good things back at you. 

 

Shuffle.

I'm trying to figure out WHY I like the music I like. Is it the music, or the experiences??
It started tonight [actually December 16th is when this draft was written, just had to spruce it up today! ;] when I pulled David in for Temple of the Dog. My iTunes was on shuffle, which was a nice change of pace since I am usually on Pandora 24/7/365... I love them so much, just reminds me of my Mom & Glen. He can sing and play them SO well!
"SOBER" BY TOOL= GETS ME EVERY TIME.
You guys I know everything old school EMINEM. I grew up listening to the most angry awful music by him, but I think I turned out alright ;)
"Voodoo" by Godsmack screams Candice Mettome and camping at Bear Lake for me.
"Mr. Jones," by Counting Crows, or anything off of the August and Everything After CD reminds me of my uncle Justin and all of his cool high school friends haha.
"Just Like You Imagined" by Nine Inch Nails = SEX.
"Change (In The House of Flies)" by Deftones -- definitely turns me on every. single. time.. and hearing/feeling it live ohhhhh my goodness.
"Take a Chance on Me," by ABBA totally reminds me of attempting to choreograph dance routines with Hilary Ballsteadt, so we could perform it for our neighbor Nick Cole and he would magically fall in love with my singing and dancing skills. (LOL on a whole other level).
When The White Stripes: "Seven Nation Army" comes on I cannot help but melt. Reminds me of that one time at Lollapalooza when Audioslave covered it!! To this day, that is still one of my favorite concerts ever!!
Aerosmith is one of my all time favorite bands, and my very first concert too! I loved Steven Tyler and his big lips, before it was cool to love Steven Tyler!! We are talking circa 1997, when I thought it was cool to wear my Sesame Street shirt with my Jinco shorts and skater shoes. [Hang tight-- I WILL find this picture for you!]
Tom Petty though.
TOM F*CKING PETTY.
I grew up with him, and one day I realized he was the one that sang all my favorite songs, to most of my favorite experiences... & Steve Miller-- "The Joker" didn't know what half the lyrics meant or who he was half my life--- but it is back from Timberlake apartment days to camping with Lori and Alan. I have the best memories of my crazy ma'ma and her free spirited friends.
RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE
Anything Chris Cornell << thanks Ma'ma! Love Soundgarden and Audioslave so hard!
Rob Zombie-- esp: "Living Dead Girl"
LIVE- "LIGHTING CRASHES" BUT REALLY, HAVE YOU SEEN A PLACENTA?!!?-- and why does it fall to the floor?
Everything Limp Bizkit-- do you know where you are?!.
Coheed and Cambria-- I think that I found these guys because Jess and Chase saw them opening up for someone... I LOVE "Coming Home" from Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV, Volume 1: From Fear Through The Eyes Of Mad. << IN FACT I love this whole album >> Like A LOT.
BROODS. I dig! I got into them from Noah actually, and his love for Chvrches. I downloaded their album Evergreen, because I am obsessed with "Four Walls." I don't know why, but this song == Stop and listen. It makes me sway, it makes me groove, it makes me feel safe, breathe out, love. I likey. >>takes me to the peak of everything I am<<<
"Drops of Jupiter" by Train-- if you give it more than 10 seconds, it is the story of my dream/perfect world. I like it, it is grounding-- on the space level.
K I am going to be honest.. the only Chiodos song I like so far is totally cliche: "The words best friends".. yaddda yadda. I've tried.. I LOVE LOVE this song, everything else, eh....
"Hit Em High"-- SPACE JAM is MY jam!!
K thanks shuffle: Skrilllllllllix--- Jenny. Period end of story. That chick is a combustible ball of energy-- no matter the kind!!!! Being on her level is a high on another level. HIM and "Otis" by Kanye and Jay Z scream Jenny Wall Clark to me too!
NELLY- holy old school-- I had the Country Grammar album because I was obsessed with the song "Country Grammar" on the Box (channel 69) on our little kitchen TV. When the older kids found out I had this CD, I was cool for like a week. (No you can't borrow it, but I'll burn you a copy ;) Guys remember Napster and Limewire? Definitely ruined a computer or two, still think all the music was worth it!
Incubus reminds me mostly of Chase Johnson & his huge Incubus poster in his bedroom, [I want to thank him for that!] Early Incubus is MY FAVORITE by FAR. It's kind of weird but I associate him the most with A Crow Left of the Murder..., Morning View, and Make Yourself [The best ones really -- the CLASSICS in my opinion.] Although, arguably Light Grenades has some of my personal favorite songs and experiences...
I feel like I have to thank Chase for the slight influences of The Mars Volta & probably Muse too...
The Black Eyed Peas might have come from Amanda Dalton-- esp: "Don't Lie" on Monkey Business. Holy 2005. Gosh what a timeless album with so many hits!!!
Kelly Clarkson is another guilty pleasure--like Pink, she relates to me. The summer I started dating David, I use to blast Pink with the windows down and try to sing along every time we were hungover. Not only did he put up with that, he encouraged me: "Oh, whoa babe I think you hit that note!" bahaha
KORN-reminds me of so many feelings.. feeling like a fool inside haha, like that one time we were all on our way to the Korn concert, and freaking Korn comes on the radio and they asked me who it was and I had no idea. I've come a long way since then. (How can you not recognize JD's voice?! I slap my face still to this day for that one)
"Diary of Jane" -- classic Breaking Benjamin. These guys scream Nick Jacobs to me. I personally think that I underrate these guys!
Seriously though, what ever happened to Akon? lol
Gwen Stafani & No Doubt!! These guys are so good, they do have that one song that just kills me. I need more of them in my life!
BECAUSE WHEN I ARRIVE I BRING THE FIRE!!!! "LET IT ROCK!" Makes me happy, every time!!
Slipknot, "Wait and Bleed" gets me so freaking excited!! Like Ashlei Hazelton going to a Chevelle concert excited.. [speaking of Chevelle :X-- totally lost the V to "Send the Pain Below" <- LOL] Anyway, I have a whole new appreciation for Slipknot thanks to Justin Clark. They use to scare me to be honest haha. But seriously, how beautiful is "Snuff" and "Vermillion"?! I should have gotten into them a lot sooner.
Alice In Chains: LONG STORY for another time.
Of course, how can I mention all this music and forget about my most favorite: A Lily Gray! Of course I might be slightly bias, but that first time I went to see them in concert I was hooked, and how lucky am I to marry the hunk that sings for them!? ;)

This just skims the surface, I have to do another shuffle night because that was fun! Thanks for staying tuned ;). I want to hear your musical experiences!!

radiation.

Do you ever catch yourself creeping on yourself? Seriously, I look back through my own Twitter, my own Facebook, my own Instagram, and I love to read back through my own blog. After all, "The only person you should be better than, is the person you were yesterday." I look back, and can't help but smile and be proud of myself. I have been trying to give myself more credit, I am pretty amazing :P. I have lived, and oh, have I learned.
Don't get me wrong, I am the ultimate creeper, after all-- that is what we have Facebook for, right?

I feel like I have been radiating sun rays out lately, or maybe it is just all that coffee... I have been carrying so much good energy, and it makes me so happy to spread the love. I freaking love my job! It makes me so happy to really bond and make sure my patient gets the best care. I love to try and help out my co-workers as much as I am able; if it makes someone else's life easier, why not? I have been trying to smile and acknowledge people by their names. I love telling my King David how much I love him, and how proud of him I am. I love kissing him every single morning! I love telling people "thank you". I love building people up, and making them feel important. I love texting my mommy. I love coffee. Pandora, SNAPCHAT. I love learning new things, being curious, and keeping my brain aroused. I just love to have a good attitude, it literally makes EVERYTHING better. I am loving ME and it feels so good!! Now I need to re-fall in love with the gym. I just need to go, I need to do!

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Anyway, update on our healthy lifestyle!!
Since January 1st, I am down 13#!! David is down 10#, and his blood pressure has dropped too! <3
We have not worked out one day, but we have significantly changed our diet! << maybe that is why I'm feelin' so good.
[P. S. I am totally still on day 15 of 30 days of Yoga! haha]

namaste loves.

Accountability.

Since I've last checked in, we've had Thanksgiving, the end of "Sober November" and the entire Christmas/New Year's season. Whoa-- that went WAY too fast!! My demise of the low-carb, ketogenic diet was November 30th when we had some celebratory drinks-- I think I was sick for a week!!! I am still on Day 15 of 30 days of yoga [LOL]. Which is straight pathetic to me, because I absolutely LOVE doing it.

This time I got David in on it with me, [the Keto, I'll keep working on the Yoga! ;] and so far, he has been great support! Poor guy had to give up all of his favorites: Cheeze-its, Mt. Dew, PB & Js. On Sunday, we had our last carb loading day, took our weight and measurements, and even some lovely before pictures. We have our meals planned out, and a blood tester to test for success. Today marks day three on our new lifestyle! I think David might be getting the "Keto Flu" already, I'm pretty pumped for him to feel the good effects of being in ketosis. I hope it helps his blood pressure too. ♥♥♥.

Gosh it feels good to be alive!

Healthy Habits

Start fresh, every single day! Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts, or things you cannot control. Instead, invest all of your energy in the positive present moment. Notice how many things you can feel, smell, see and hear.
Breathe it all in-- and breathe it all out.

Sugar is evil.
Eat whole foods as much as possible.
Consolidate and pay off debt ASAP.
Stand up for yourself!
[Optimize fertility]
CONCEIVE BELIEVE ACHIEVE
Love yourself.
If you want to get over your issues and rock your life, be grateful, look for the good and learn.
Be grateful for all you are and all that you're becoming.

"If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration." // Nokola Tesla

rambles of the evening.

Commit to releasing your attachment to low frequency thoughts and experiences, trust that the universe loves the crap out of you, kick fear in the face, and head bravely into the unknown.
Talk to strangers, we're all family on this planet.
Expect, and enjoy, the unexpected.
Find the humor.
Join the party.
Live in the moment.
Time spent enjoying yourself is never wasted.
Share your space.
Loosen your bone, Wilma.

[Sincero, Jen. You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life. Philadelphia: Running, 2013. Print.]