Three things I'm thankful for right now:
1. Brushing my teeth, +having good teeth.
2. Reality checks. Both good and bad.
3. Mirrors. [Judge away, if I could do everything in front of a mirror; I would.• I bet I would judge myself worse than you do]
LOVE the LIFE you LIVE ⇆ LIVE the LIFE you LOVE.
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Monday, September 10, 2012
just another week in the life..
WOW, what a week.
I guess I will start from the beginning:
MONDAY:
Woke up early for a quick 5 mile run with my mom
then
Worked 12 hours for time and a half.
TUESDAY: Class, a quick cardio at the gym, an amazing homemade lunch, and the best part? A DAY OFF
WEDNESDAY: An ass kicking at body pump.
Hiked Timpanogos and toured the caves with Liz.
and went on a spur of the moment midnight hike with Jeremy to Fifth Springs hot pots.
It was so cool, I can't wait to see it in the day!
[Sorry none of my pictures turned out]
THURSDAY:
I kind of slept through class.. (Don't tell my mom)
Another awesome lunch.
The usual, staff meeting, guitar lessons.. and one of my [SILLIEST] highlights:
FINALLY DRINKING OUT OF MY OWN MUG AT MY FAVORITE BAR. kind of lame, but I have been excited about it for weeks, and it finally came!
FRIDAY:
Another long 12 hour work day.
A beautiful wedding.
Finally getting to see my BFF [another serious highlight]
SATURDAY:
A short and sweet 6 hour shift.
Seeing my best friend [two nights in a row!!] annnnnnnd the #1 highlight: I met a boy
[Side note: he has a pet jelly fish
he drinks the most rare and expensive coffee in the world: Kopi Luwak
he wants to fly me down to San Fransisco and take me sailing
he is freaking sexy.
he made me feel like the "most gorgeous girl" he's ever met..
and he somehow tricked a kiss out of me, and I loved it.
basically he is too good to be true, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and see what happens.
Basically I have been professionally schmoozed.]
Update: He was nothing but a professional schmoozer, cheater, and loser haha. Fun times for sure tho, and no regrets haha.
I guess I will start from the beginning:
MONDAY:
Woke up early for a quick 5 mile run with my mom
then
Worked 12 hours for time and a half.
TUESDAY: Class, a quick cardio at the gym, an amazing homemade lunch, and the best part? A DAY OFF
WEDNESDAY: An ass kicking at body pump.
Hiked Timpanogos and toured the caves with Liz.
and went on a spur of the moment midnight hike with Jeremy to Fifth Springs hot pots.
It was so cool, I can't wait to see it in the day!
[Sorry none of my pictures turned out]
THURSDAY:
I kind of slept through class.. (Don't tell my mom)
Another awesome lunch.
The usual, staff meeting, guitar lessons.. and one of my [SILLIEST] highlights:
FINALLY DRINKING OUT OF MY OWN MUG AT MY FAVORITE BAR. kind of lame, but I have been excited about it for weeks, and it finally came!
FRIDAY:
Another long 12 hour work day.
A beautiful wedding.
Finally getting to see my BFF [another serious highlight]
SATURDAY:
A short and sweet 6 hour shift.
Seeing my best friend [two nights in a row!!] annnnnnnd the #1 highlight: I met a boy
[Side note: he has a pet jelly fish
he drinks the most rare and expensive coffee in the world: Kopi Luwak
he wants to fly me down to San Fransisco and take me sailing
he is freaking sexy.
he made me feel like the "most gorgeous girl" he's ever met..
and he somehow tricked a kiss out of me, and I loved it.
basically he is too good to be true, but I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and see what happens.
Basically I have been professionally schmoozed.]
Update: He was nothing but a professional schmoozer, cheater, and loser haha. Fun times for sure tho, and no regrets haha.
Monday, August 27, 2012
Some good advice..
I don't think any one reads my blog, but here is some good advice for you anyway..
Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:
1. Give up your need to always be right.
There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?
2. Give up your need for control.
Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.
“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu
3. Give up on blame.
Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk.
Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.
“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle
5. Give up your limiting beliefs.
Your beliefs about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!
“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle
6. Give up complaining.
Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism.
Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.
8. Give up your need to impress others.
Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.
9. Give up your resistance to change.
Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell
10. Give up labels.
Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open.
“The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer
11. Give up on your fears.
Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt
12. Give up your excuses.
Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.
13. Give up the past.
I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.
14. Give up attachment.
This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.
15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations.
Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.
from this website
Here is a list of 15 things which, if you give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, much happier. We hold on to so many things that cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead of letting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy – we cling on to them. Not anymore. Starting today we will give up on all those things that no longer serve us, and we will embrace change. Ready? Here we go:
1. Give up your need to always be right.
There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need to jump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself this question: “Would I rather be right, or would I rather be kind?” Wayne Dyer. What difference will that make? Is your ego really that big?
2. Give up your need for control.
Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.
“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu
3. Give up on blame.
Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.
4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk.
Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.
“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” Eckhart Tolle
5. Give up your limiting beliefs.
Your beliefs about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!
“A belief is not an idea held by the mind, it is an idea that holds the mind” Elly Roselle
6. Give up complaining.
Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.
7. Give up the luxury of criticism.
Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.
8. Give up your need to impress others.
Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.
9. Give up your resistance to change.
Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resist it.
“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls” Joseph Campbell
10. Give up labels.
Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open.
“The highest form of ignorance is when you reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer
11. Give up on your fears.
Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.
“The only thing we have to fear, is fear itself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt
12. Give up your excuses.
Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses – excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.
13. Give up the past.
I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it was present. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoy life. After all life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision for the future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.
14. Give up attachment.
This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well, real love is pure, kind, and self less, where there is love there can’t be fear, and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist) you become so peaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all things without even trying. A state beyond words.
15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations.
Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need….and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one life – this one right now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.
from this website
So I have this little BIG
problem, and it is becoming increasingly more and more annoying.
I have a serious case of Philematophobia.
[the fear of kissing]
This is not a joke. I admit it sounds silly, (cause it is).
In all honestly I have enjoyed a few kisses in the past..
& I love the thought of being kissed passionately in the rain.
.. but in real life, when a boy gives you that look, and you know what's coming..
I PANIC!
My heart starts pounding,
My knees go weak,
My palms sweat,
I can't breathe.
& I flee.
It's so awkward.
& It's so annoying.
I physically cannot do it :'(.
I just want to be normal, and enjoy a freaking kiss like the rest of the world..
any advice is more than welcome,
please and thank you!
I have a serious case of Philematophobia.
[the fear of kissing]
This is not a joke. I admit it sounds silly, (cause it is).
In all honestly I have enjoyed a few kisses in the past..
& I love the thought of being kissed passionately in the rain.
.. but in real life, when a boy gives you that look, and you know what's coming..
I PANIC!
My heart starts pounding,
My knees go weak,
My palms sweat,
I can't breathe.
& I flee.
It's so awkward.
& It's so annoying.
I physically cannot do it :'(.
I just want to be normal, and enjoy a freaking kiss like the rest of the world..
any advice is more than welcome,
please and thank you!
Friday, August 24, 2012
#Blessed.
I am not angry.
I am not bitter.
I am not sad.
& I am not lying.
I am strong. [More so than I ever thought possible.]
I am honored [I got to experience real love.]
& I am happy.
It's overwhelmingly surreal just how much life can change in a moment.
Today, more than normal, I feel blessed.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
+
On my constant journey to be perfectly content, I've only read the prelude to "The Secret", just enough to find out what the "secret" really is. The law of attraction. I don't know enough, but I know for a fact I believe in it 100%.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Gingervitis
I've been called names such as carrot top, fire ball, ginger, Agent Orange, fire crotch, & freckle face to name a few of the nicer ones..
I've also gotten compliments my whole life on my hair color, and I am just now beginning to really appreciate it. You really can't get this color from a box!! Of course with the hair comes the "freak skin" and freckles... but I'm beginning to kind of like those too..
Here are some red hair inspired facts for you:
I am a mutant! Red hair is caused by a recessive mutation on the MC1R gene on chromosome 16.
That same gene mutation causes Spirit Bears too.
There are more Mormons than Redheads! Only 1-2% of the world has red hair, and it's slowly dying out:(.
We have less hairs on our head then the average person, but the hairs themselves tend to be thicker.
We are more sensitive to pain, and it normally takes 20% more anesthesia to make us comfortable. No wonder I don't love my dentist.
Throughout history we have been called violent, emotional, hot tempered, crazy, mystical, and unclean..
In early Germany, natural red hair was considered to be a sure sign that a woman was a witch. The Greeks believed that red heads became vampires when they died. Egyptians reportedly paid tribute to their god by burying men with red hair while they were still alive. If you pass a red haired person on the street in Corsica, you're supposed to spit. Yet it's considered an honor to have a red haired child in Denmark..
With that being said, do you think having red hair is a blessing, or a curse?
I hope you all have a favorite red head in your life!
Until next time- ☮ ♥ ☀
I've also gotten compliments my whole life on my hair color, and I am just now beginning to really appreciate it. You really can't get this color from a box!! Of course with the hair comes the "freak skin" and freckles... but I'm beginning to kind of like those too..
Here are some red hair inspired facts for you:
I am a mutant! Red hair is caused by a recessive mutation on the MC1R gene on chromosome 16.
That same gene mutation causes Spirit Bears too.
There are more Mormons than Redheads! Only 1-2% of the world has red hair, and it's slowly dying out:(.
We have less hairs on our head then the average person, but the hairs themselves tend to be thicker.
We are more sensitive to pain, and it normally takes 20% more anesthesia to make us comfortable. No wonder I don't love my dentist.
Throughout history we have been called violent, emotional, hot tempered, crazy, mystical, and unclean..
In early Germany, natural red hair was considered to be a sure sign that a woman was a witch. The Greeks believed that red heads became vampires when they died. Egyptians reportedly paid tribute to their god by burying men with red hair while they were still alive. If you pass a red haired person on the street in Corsica, you're supposed to spit. Yet it's considered an honor to have a red haired child in Denmark..
With that being said, do you think having red hair is a blessing, or a curse?
I hope you all have a favorite red head in your life!
Until next time- ☮ ♥ ☀
Thursday, July 19, 2012
I don't communicate very well..
I have so many things I want to say, but something between my brain and my mouth [or my fingers in this case] simply does not function right.
I always want to write in my blog or in my journal, and I am always afraid to sound stupid, or be judged by my writing.
I have decided this is ridiculous. I am who I am, and I love who I am - so why care what anyone else thinks? That is their problem, not mine.. right?
I have decided to take my own advice and just do it. I know I don't communicate very well WHATSOEVER, but maybe with practice I will be able to express myself a little bit better.
Until next time- Peace, love and sunshine!
I always want to write in my blog or in my journal, and I am always afraid to sound stupid, or be judged by my writing.
I have decided this is ridiculous. I am who I am, and I love who I am - so why care what anyone else thinks? That is their problem, not mine.. right?
I have decided to take my own advice and just do it. I know I don't communicate very well WHATSOEVER, but maybe with practice I will be able to express myself a little bit better.
Until next time- Peace, love and sunshine!
Saturday, May 19, 2012
I turned 24 this week!!
It left almost faster than it came, and I am still in denial.
My adorable aunt in law was commenting on my age yesterday, telling me she had her life planned up just until 24! That was her big year, she graduated from the U, married my uncle and got pregnant, all in the same year.
HOLY CRAP.
That sure did put my life in perspective.. I had my life semi planned out too, I was going to marry the boy I have been in love with my whole life. I would be married by the end of this year (10/11/12).
That is a scary thought.
"Life is what is happening while you are busy making other plans"- I can honestly say I am happy with where I am in life, and whom I have become. Yeah, sure I will probably never finish school, and never get married.. but I love my life to the fullest, and that is all that matters right? #YOLO.
Instead of doing my "New Years Resolutions" on January 1st, I decided I wanted to start them May 14th, a fresh start for another year in my life. This is going to be the best year yet. :)
It left almost faster than it came, and I am still in denial.
My adorable aunt in law was commenting on my age yesterday, telling me she had her life planned up just until 24! That was her big year, she graduated from the U, married my uncle and got pregnant, all in the same year.
HOLY CRAP.
That sure did put my life in perspective.. I had my life semi planned out too, I was going to marry the boy I have been in love with my whole life. I would be married by the end of this year (10/11/12).
That is a scary thought.
"Life is what is happening while you are busy making other plans"- I can honestly say I am happy with where I am in life, and whom I have become. Yeah, sure I will probably never finish school, and never get married.. but I love my life to the fullest, and that is all that matters right? #YOLO.
Instead of doing my "New Years Resolutions" on January 1st, I decided I wanted to start them May 14th, a fresh start for another year in my life. This is going to be the best year yet. :)
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Rise up
This quote is simply amazing.
As you may or may not know, Jess and I broke up the end of October, and we both really need to take it for what it is, and move on.
Given the situation and the current circumstances, it is terribly sad to see it end like it did.
Anyone who has ever seen "Jess & Jessi" together cannot deny there is an attraction there. Love has never been an issue between us, and I can honestly say he is one amazing person, and an incredible friend.. Sometimes people change, and feelings change. Given our history together, it is so sad, but you only live once, and we both need to work on us as individuals, and be truly satisfied in life.
"the hardest part about the fucking business is minding your own" -Drake
Nobody will ever know what is really between us, besides us. As strong as both of us are, there is still an open wound.. but absolutely no hate! I hope as our family and friends you can respect that, stay out of our business, and support each of us in what we do with our own separate lives. Thank you!
As always, peace, love and sunshine- coming your way :)
As you may or may not know, Jess and I broke up the end of October, and we both really need to take it for what it is, and move on.
Given the situation and the current circumstances, it is terribly sad to see it end like it did.
Anyone who has ever seen "Jess & Jessi" together cannot deny there is an attraction there. Love has never been an issue between us, and I can honestly say he is one amazing person, and an incredible friend.. Sometimes people change, and feelings change. Given our history together, it is so sad, but you only live once, and we both need to work on us as individuals, and be truly satisfied in life.
"the hardest part about the fucking business is minding your own" -Drake
Nobody will ever know what is really between us, besides us. As strong as both of us are, there is still an open wound.. but absolutely no hate! I hope as our family and friends you can respect that, stay out of our business, and support each of us in what we do with our own separate lives. Thank you!
As always, peace, love and sunshine- coming your way :)
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